Nice

Some random military guy who had been huffing paint rang the doorbell like 20 minutes ago. I answer the door and he starts going on about how he was just hit by a chemical attack and needs help. Initially, I'm like "Yeah, right." After a few minutes of that, I hand him my phone and tell him to call 911. I tried to keep him out of the house, but I finally caved and let him stand in the doorway while on the phone with 911. That's when I started smelling the paint. He hands me the phone so the 911 guys can talk to me, since he was obviously out of it or lying. The cops show up quickly enough (and in great numbers, like, 4 or 5 cars), and I find out the guy has been out in the garage and took a small package of yogurt. Anyway, the cops took him away.

He seemed like a nice enough guy, at least. The military part of his story checks out, as he did have a VA ID on him. He was very grateful that I let him use my phone and let him in the house to get away from "the chemical that was getting him." I suspect he's got a touch of PTSD that was aggravated by the paint fumes.